Arguing with myself

If you sit in a quiet room alone and just focus on one question, it doesn’t matter the question or how simple it is, just a question that the answer could go either way. Think about this question, lets say it is “should I go to town?”, just sit and ponder on the answer in your head. Soon you will have an answer, but if you wait a little longer you may have another answer and then before long you will be hearing these two mental voices trying to convince you that their answer is the best way to go. The arguing in your head can become so annoying you will leave the room and find something to help distract your mind and forget about going to town, so in the end one of these voices always wins the question now becons “is it always the right one?”

As a kid watching Loony Toons, ok so maybe I did watch them into my adult years, so what (there’s those voices going off in my head again distracting me with unnecessary arguing). So as a kid watching Loony Toons, I can remember several skits where Sylvester the cat wanted to scheme some method to catch the Tweety bird. In this particular memory, the cat had this image of itself dressed in white dawning a halo and wings and this good conscience would remind the cat of how bad it would be to do the act he was preparing for. Then obviously, appears this image of the cat wearing a devil’s suit who tries to belittle the advice of the good conscience and tries to get the cat to go through with his evil plan. These two inner voices of this cat become so annoying and creates so much confusion that the cat swats aimlessly at these entities as if swatting at flies buzzing around his head. This time that the cat wasted listening to his moral senses caused him to miss any opportunity to do what ever it was he was planning anyways. In this cartoon skit, the arguing in the cat’s head allowed good to prevail, at least for the bird; it was a kids show after all.

In life it can seem as if the same scenario is taking place, sometimes more often than not. In addition, in life good moral sense doesn’t always prevail when the inner voices confuse us so much that the action is loss. Sometimes we needed to do what ever it was our minds were fighting but lost the courage because of these entities floating on our shoulders. Certainly we can learn to identify which voice is beneficial to listen to and fits inline with our moral compass. The problem arises when we are able to stand closer to good the demons around try to pull harder, ripping and tearing trying to get you back closer to the darkness. Their voices become louder and more annoying, and at times they can even mimic the good sense so well that you need to think harder about the advice these voices are giving you.

We sit in this room with one question we must answer and have this good and bad sense sitting on our shoulders. This leads to both of these little inner voices debating and then arguing. We become forced to develop migraine like pain and swat aimlessly at the nothingness around our heads. This resistance begins to tug and pull until it begins to rip and tear as it shreds pieces from our soul. Eventually we are left exhausted, beaten and bruised, and in the end did nothing regarding the question we were trying to answer.

As we lay there wishing someone would help we know that we are alone and must get back up off the floor but this only leads to another question which ultimately starts this cycle all over again. At least Sylvester the cat had commercials strategically placed throughout the 30 min skit and at all cost we could just reach over and turn off the television.

Lord, please give me the strength to stop arguing with myself