Yep! I’ve made my mind up and I’m going to do this; despite the growing opposing opinions and constant tricks and threats of the others. What are the others? It’s simple really; we spend a whole lot time during our lives searching for the good in people, the kindness, love, and compassion that might just make this world a little more livable and the reason we look so hard for these God-like qualities is because we are surrounded by all the crime, hatred, pain, sorrow, and darkness generated by the fallen and his minions. There are good, kind, and loving souls out there and then there are the others. It is the endless attacks of the others that pushed me to finding the right path. It is also the hatred of the others that tried to knock me off that path.
I was warned beforehand and that very warning is what I feel enabled me to laugh off much of the strife that was thrown at me leading up to that day. I felt that I could handle it all; well I was wrong and I underestimated the powers of the others. I suppose self-assurance or cockiness can be damning if projected in the wrong manner. It can also tend to make the others a bit more aggressive because your over confidence in your ability to fend off the others leaves you open to their cunning sucker punches. It’s far better to be cautious than to get hit harder just because you instigated their treachery. I was hit from every possible direction and by the end I felt as if my soul cried all week long and was completely saturated by tears, pain, and sorrow. There were so many times I felt as if I was going to be knocked down and kicked and punched as if it was a back alley brawl that I just lost. I was shaking so much inside it must of seemed as if I was nervous and scared but in reality it was because I had very little strength to function. Yep! I was warned and the others certainly did what that warning predicted but here I am and I am doing this, wounded and in pain but with all the inner tears I have I am doing this.
Why? Well here it is … sometimes you just have to follow that little gut feeling inside. That little sense that you are turned in the right direction despite what those who have yet to understand want to tell you. So it may not be the popular opinion among your peers but someone has to do it some day and I have this feeling that this is right. My gut feelings have never led me too far off the tracks, sometimes I misinterpret them but far more often than that those little feelings inside gets me back on the straight and narrow path. Far to many times do we find ourselves confused by the chaos of life where all the background noise drowns the guidance of our inner spirit. Sometimes the biggest step forward is just stop and tuning out the rest of the world so that we can hear deep inside the soft calming voice.
A friend taught me to slow down and filter out all the noises creating havoc in my mind and just listen to the one voice that wasn’t yelling. It was the ability to realize the difference from the guidance of those leading me in path happiness and those whom were trying to seal my soul and damn me to everlasting pain and sorrow. At one time I found myself in the middle of all these arguments within my head at which I was never able to get a word in edgewise. Yeah … it sounds like I needed to be fitted for a heavy-weight long armed jacket that ties in the back but this is how I felt. I would be thinking about something, say a question or a problem that I needed to figure out and a voice inside would tell me one thing and other voices would argue that it was the wrong way to go about it. That childish bantering of “yes it is” and “no it’s not” which always leads to “I know you are what am I”.
This friend taught me to listen with intent and seek out those answers that where of good means and by doing so I was empowered to discern the influence of the others. What a feeling of confidence when you finally are certain you choose to follow the correct voice and are able to witness the good doing so created. Certainly the array of voices and influences are still within my mind, but they are becoming distinctive. Think of it like a little humble child walking up to you in a crowd of people. This child and its “puppy dog” eyes quietly tries to tell you something and the noise of the crowd muffles the voice of the child. You learn that in order to listen to this child you must lower yourself away from the crowd and become closer to the child at which point you can hear that child’s soft voice. By separating yourself from the chaos of the crowd and becoming closer to the child you are also moving away from stress and closer to compassion.
So here I am … I feel I have better guidance and a path that will lead me out of the damnation of these shadows. You know if you try to test the water before you go in it will feel extremely cold and you will hesitate and back away. If you just go right in you will learn that the water is warm and soothing and that it is the extent of your extremities that cannot feel the warmth. We tend to use our fingers and toes to test the water and by doing so the result is not what we want, yet if we put our heart and mind closer to the water we realize that our hands and feet are only tools to help the needs of the mind and heart. If we rely only on what we can touch or stand upon we certainly would feel less and remain in one place.
Well it’s too late … I did it and I didn’t test the waters with my toes either. I admit I had to gather myself after the week-long battles with all the various others in my life but I did succeed. I just walked into it with confidence that this was the right path. I took a cleansing breath and then a moment of silence and it was underway. It literally felt as if a warming pool was completely overcoming me and then for a moment complete peace. As I exited there was no more doubt, no more fear, and no more inner tears. It was just that feeling as if I was brand new. Almost as if you dressed up in your first brand new Sunday best and wanted everyone to see. And just like those brand new Sunday best, I had this feeling that I needed to take care of this which I now have and keep it from being tarnished or stained. I felt that I want to do what it takes to keep that feeling of peace.
A man once told of a story when he was in a plane flying through a storm. He asked the pilot how they could fly through without knowing how close they were from the ground. The pilot explained that they use a radio signal that will change tones when the plane begins to veer off course. This man explained that our path in this life can be similar to when the plane began to veer off course. I feel this is true because I can feel within when I begin to move away from this peace that I felt. I can feel my blood boil when I get upset and I can feel my muscles tighten when I start to feel stressed. My shoulders drop and I can sense the tears within me when I get sad. We have all these senses within us that tell us when we are moving away from that peace we all desire.
If we become strong enough and are able to learn more about ourselves and what our purpose is here we can resist the influence of the others. If we are not confused by their deception and lies, if we are not blind by their tricks and treachery, if we seek out that soft calming voice we can humble ourselves to seek the path that was intended for us. By doing so we can learn what we must do to get back on that path and what is needed to stay on that path intended to us and then have that peace. We don’t have to walk this path alone, there are already so many on it and those whom we hold closest to us can also choose to walk along side us but it is their choice. It has to be a matter of choice and they can see you walking and using the radio frequencies to keep you from veering off course and away from peace. They will watch you and see that you do not fall and they will see the change and that in itself will cause them to look within themselves. It will take patience because it must be their choice not ours.
Yep! I did it and I am glad. I feel cleansed … I feel refreshed … I feel forgiven. I know the others are unhappy about their failure and loss. I also know that they will try to pull me back into the darkness. You can’t possibly standup to them once and win to feel as if that is all you must do because your win is only them regrouping and waiting for you to veer off course and then they will attack with much more fury than the last time and if you do not build up your knowledge and your strength you will fall. When you make this stand you must keep moving forward because you have work that needs to be done and by doing so you empower yourself more and more.
These are a few words of friends of mine that make some sense. Have real intent … seek out the answers that which are of good … and most importantly Just do it. Just do it because if you doubt it or test the waters you may just be deceived. If you feel deep within your soul that it is right and that small quiet voice inside you is telling you it will be okay then … Just do it.